Conspiracy theorists and celebration police throw nebs during the Arsenal vs. Manchester United match.

While the Football Daily jury is still split on whether or not Sunday’s set-to between Arsenal and Manchester United was particularly good in terms of quality, it was extremely entertaining and checked off a ton of boxes.

Beginning with a certain tinfoil hat-wearing Dutchman, conspiracy theorists on both sides got to feel unfairly treated.

Erik ten Hag lamented, “I thought we played a very good game, but everything went against us,” in the post-game interview.

“It was at the incorrect angle; it wasn’t offside.

After we concede a goal due to a clear and obvious foul on Jonny Evans, it was a penalty on [Rasmus] Hjlund. While Ten Hag may have had a point regarding the fouls committed against his players, we suspect that he would have had a different opinion if the same offenses had been committed against them in the same circumstances. He also failed to mention the most egregious decision of the afternoon, which was the VAR consultation that resulted in the penalty against his team being overturned despite the absence of even the slightest hint that the decision to award it had been clearly and obviously incorrect.

The celebration police also got to get in on the action, launching into a lot of po-faced tut-tutting as Arsenal’s players reveled in a completely wild finish in which they’d snatched victory from halfway down the digestive tract of defeat against their fierce rivals.

Gooners can be excused for enjoying this nerve-wracking ride immensely, even though early indications suggest that Manchester City’s players and staff will be celebrating in victory when the Premier League champions are officially announced in May. And no, they don’t need some internet buzz-kill living in a bedroom to point out that they did the exact same thing after their last-second victory over Bournemouth in March, and look what transpired after that.

So it is Arsenal who enters the international break riding a wave of confidence.

In fact, it is said that a young man allegedly attempted to nut Roy Keane in a stadium hallway following the game.

Video of the incident shows Micah Richards, a muscular fellow pundit with Keane, holding the alleged attacker to a door while, in the words of the pair’s employers Sky Sports, he attempted “to defuse a situation.”.

A 42-year-old man has now been arrested while Richards was agonizing over whether to cut the red or the blue wire.

Fortunately, Keane didn’t appear to sustain any significant physical injuries, but the blow to his ego from having a colleague 17 years younger than him save him may take some time to recover from.

United’s Jadon Sancho was quick to respond when his manager told reporters he had left the winger out of his matchday squad because of his “performance in training,” another post-match controversy that could have long-term ramifications.

Sancho claimed in an amazing Social Media Abomination TwiXer post that “there are other reasons for this matter that I won’t go into” and that he has been “a scapegoat for a long time” that he believes “there are other reasons for this matter that I won’t go into” those in charge of the club’s fan sentiment graphs.

Now, a more private discussion between the player and the manager is anticipated in the upcoming days, at which point Sancho will probably be asked to either clear the air or his locker at the training facility.

For more updates, we are at your service all day long and all night long

 

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